Archives for January 2008

Who’s Really With You?

With YouPlaying rugby is often like being thrust in the middle of repeated broken plays and controlled chaos. In the midst of this chaos the sweetest words a player with the ball can hear are “with you.” That means that you can advance the ball right to the point of contact and know that someone is there to receive your lateral. Because another is there for you, lost ground is minimized and momentum is maintained.

“With you” means “I’m here for you – I’m on your side and I’ll take it from here.” Support is not in question. It’s unconditional because of the common bond of a clear objective and agreed upon ground rules.

Recalling my playing days, I wondered what our work lives might be like if we could recreate such beautiful support? Wonder no more. I created such an experience The Unconditional Support Experience simply asking folks to take this work life SURVEY.

The Unconditional Support Experience was an experiment to experience the blessings of feeling total, unconditional and celebrated support.

It was a group coaching experience, by telephone, with the objective of inspiring authentic magnificence.

As your facilitator and leader here’s what I believe.

  • Authenticity is the most direct route to happiness, fulfillment, prosperity and all things good.
  • We can all do one simple thing better than anyone else in the world – we can be ourselves.
  • When we uncover, express and exploit our core magnificence, life comes easier and feels more natural – we experience spectacular states of being.
  • The Universe and your soul both love you unconditionally and both want you to succeed magnificently. You will feel this love as your authentic self.
  • You came pre-equipped to create wonder in whatever result or way you most desire.
  • The main thing keeping you back from this natural creation of wonder is a collection of your fears, limiting beliefs and conditioning that cause you to show up as less than you are.
  • The affect of this toxicity can be lessened, released and even eliminated to the extent that you choose to live a purely authentic life.

It is my commitment that by feeling the wonderful warmth of support in this experience, you will begin to let go of what no longer serves you and come into your authentic magnificence.

What questions does this raise for you? I’d love to answer them here so that this discussion may encourage others to join us.

When you imagine feeling this extraordinary level of support, what thoughts show up for you? Are you with me? Then take this SURVEY for enrollment information.
Stumble It!

Where are all the people who don’t know what they want to be when they grow up?

I’m looking for people who are, at this time, looking for inspired vocational guidance. Professionally, this is what matters most to me. I want to find these folks and help them to realize how to live the calling that only they can give the world. I need your help to spread the word. Will you help?

Delightful Work Blog Declaration of Intent
Our mission is to increase the number of folks on this planet who are in active pursuit of work life freedom. We are doing so by:

  1. Encouraging and inspiring the action of discovering, validating and engaging in the authentic pursuit of livelihood – a livelihood so right for you that it provides all of what you want in fulfillment and financial reward.
  2. Creating a community of those who want an ongoing dialogue with others who are in similar pursuit.

I’ve been coaching folks in career transition since 1998. It’s the coaching assignment that I care about the most. But it’s clear to me that I need your help to spread the word.

Why would you help me?

Perhaps you believe as I do that our world would be a much more productive and happier place if more folks would simply do what they really love to do for a living. But would that be enough reason for you to help me in this quest?

Perhaps, like me, you really feel for those folks who struggle needlessly when it comes to making a living. Money is a very complex concept, especially when it’s all interwoven with our sense of self-worth and self-judgment of our personal talents.

Maybe you’ll do it for them. Will you pass along this post or Stumble it for all those folks who need help in transitioning to a more fulfilling career? Stumble It!

I can assure you that they will be in very good hands. Have you ever asked yourself the question: What can you be best in the world at? (From the Jim Collins classic Good to Great) My answer: telephone coaching a group of true calling seekers into action on their right livelihood.

I’m open to feedback on how you would reach this group of folks. Where would you look for them? Here’s a question for you. Are the reasons above enough for you to help or do you require further incentive? If you’re a blogger, I’m more than willing to reciprocate in any reasonable way.

But I wonder if that’s still enough incentive for you to go out of your way and help me to spread the word. Time is dear for most of us, so I asked myself this question. If someone were asking me for this same kind of help, what would inspire me to help? Here’s my answer.

Social networking with a deeper connection

I’d be sure to help if I’d be assured of a deeper ongoing connection in the months and years to come. Everyone reading this is aware of social networking sites. I’ve reached out and begun making connections on them as some of you have. But I often wonder if I would be better off belonging to a smaller group who cared more for one another and who were willing to aid one another to a greater extent. A small group of dedicated folks who come alive in deeper, more meaningful connection would make me feel more socially connected. If you’d like to discuss creating such a group, please let me know.

“Anything or anyone that does not bring you alive is too small for you.” – David Whyte, from his poem Sweet Darkness.

Who knows what we would have already accomplished if we had been celebrated and loved unconditionally in our formative years?

Whistle While You Work – Happiness Matters

The thought gurus in the movie and book The Secret agree that in order to create the life we want, we need to quit focusing on what’s happening to us and focus our thoughts and words on a picture and feelings of what we really want.

Unfortunately, most folks look at what’s happening and react to that. If what’s happening to you is not what you want, then by focusing on it you just get more of it. What we focus on expands. What we think about, comes about.

Yet according to Sonja Lyubomirsky in her book The How of Happiness our circumstances only account for 10% of what contributes to our happiness. She’s proven that 50% of what contributes to our happiness is our upbringing and genetics. We can’t do anything about that. However, it’s the other 40% that’s vital. Because that 40% is based on our intentional determination and we can choose to have it override the other 60%.

Shawn Achor, Head Teaching Fellow for Harvard’s popular Positive Psychology course shares how scientists have proven that happier people actually have an unfair advantage over others.

Adrian White, an analytic social psychologist, studies happiness and found Denmark to be the happiest nation in the world. The USA ranked number 23. A recent 20/20 television show on happiness referenced a study where Denmark was third. Still not too shabby!

I found these two factors particularly interesting in how they relate to work life happiness.

1). The tax rate in Denmark is 63% of income and the social services given by the welfare state are so supportive and all-encompassing that there isn’t as much need to take risks or try to be wealthy. Because there is a much narrower gap between the rich and the poor, the Danes have created a society where every job is valued and respected. This results in more people simply choosing to do what they enjoy doing without concern for how much it pays or what others think of them.The Danes have created a consumer-less society that’s truly brilliant. They have less reason to compare themselves to their neighbors. Most everyone is on the same level as the Joneses, so the need to keep up with them is removed.

2).Talk about social connection, an astounding 92% of adult Danes belong to either a singing or a dancing club. Imagine a life without financial concern and comparison. In such a life, being the social animals that we are, building relationships would become naturally more of a priority.

Singing is a physical act that draws oxygen in and makes the blood stream richer and opens up the brain so I can think more clearly and get intuitions I didn’t have before. So, I always look to get into action whenever I’m stuck. If the mind is stuck, if the spirit is low–I let the body lead the way even if I don’t feel like it.  Steve Chandler

To summarize here is your action recipe.

  1. Whistle and sing before and while you work.
  2. Know and act on the basis that being happy will get you more of what you want.
  3. Know and act on the basis that you can choose happiness and by doing so you can create the life you most want to win.

My heart goes out to each of you who continue to look at what’s wrong or what’s lacking in your life. Please stop that nonsense now. Yes, tough things happen to good people. But struggle is optional. Isn’t it time for you to wake up and come alive in the glory of your own making?

What’s So Overwhelming About Information Overload?

What’s so overwhelming about information overload? Why do we see it as overload at all? Why do we see too much information as overwhelming? Before the Internet we didn’t get upset because we couldn’t read every book in the library.

If anything, we ought to be overjoyed at all these opportunities to learn, grow and profit. So instead of overwhelm, how about trying on this vein of thought?

What’s really wonderful about having so much information right at our keyboards?

If overwhelmed with overload, you might be forgetting your unique mindset. You, I and everyone else can only see through our own perspective filters. What I find fascinating and inspiring may be boring as hell for you.

Perhaps we could all ask these questions instead of moaning about our inability to keep up.

What if what I’m considering is exactly the right thing for me to see right now? What do I need to see or learn in order to make the decisions that are right in front of me? If overwhelmed, what am I really afraid of?

Hint … perhaps I’m scared to death because with so much information readily available I no longer have the procrastinator’s ignorance excuse of not knowing what to do.

Once this excuse is removed, a feeling of holy cow I’ve got to do something comes up.

Let’s look at the sunny side of overload and overwhelm. Opportunities are endless and we can seize them with the proper focus.

No one can see the opportunity you’re seeing quite like you can. All you need is a feeling of go for it to seize what you see. What’s missing could be the support and encouragement to take action. I’m offering you a way to come together with real support and connection. That group is soon to start.

There is that brief point of inspiration where we need to seize our opportunities as they are illuminated by our own desires. Look out for your points of inspiration. Make note of them. Write them down so you give yourself permission to go back and add to the ideas. An opportunity journal relieves the pressure in a positive way.

What else allows this? Taking action, completing anything, positive encouragement and movement through a point of personal challenge – all will get you feeling light and easy instead of overwhelmed. Quit moaning and be the man or woman you know you can be.

Stumble It!

Four Ways to Awaken Your Hidden Advantage

Leading with your strengths gives you a natural, positional advantage that can make your work life easier, your business more productive and far more fulfilling.

Are you leading with your strengths or are you settling and struggling by engaging your weaknesses? Strengths are our natural talents, powers, qualities, tendencies, capacities and characteristics. Weaknesses are inadequate or defective qualities – lacking strength and vigor.

If you find yourself struggling to complete projects or settling for less enjoyment and aliveness than you know is possible, chances are you’re underutilizing your strengths. What can you do about it?

Begin by journaling and reflecting on the following insights and questions.

  1. Become increasingly aware of when you are struggling and when your work has very little pizzazz to it. What are you engaged in when that happens? Then ask, what natural strength might I lean on to change my results or to change how I feel about my results? Then name that strength so you can claim it.
  2. Know that you are naturally more attractive and more poised when you are simply being yourself. Striving to be something you aren’t takes you out of the present. Yet the present is the only place that you have the power to get what you want. Trying to lead with strengths you don’t have actually postpones the process of being who you are. All good things come to those who are real.So, where are you faking it? In what areas of your life are you certain that you could never excel? What would happen if you just dropped all such activities today?
  3. Strengths actually enlarge the fierce and gentle capacities in our heart. Courage, compassion and generosity are more readily put into play when we lead with our strengths. When we are not leading with our strengths, we are leading with our limitations and compensations. These shortcomings are not elemental to our nature. They are illusions that we trick ourselves into believing to be true. Often when we are not leading with our strengths we make the false assumption that we must be lacking in some way. Know this, you aren’t lacking anything. If you don’t feel energized and strong, you’re being less than you could be by choice. How would your life be different if you only worked on projects where you could lead with your strengths? Who you are right now is more than enough. Believe that and act on it.
  4. Connect to divine guidance because that’s how our strengths were originally installed. Guidance comes easier to verbs than to nouns. Nouns tend to be permanent resting places. Verbs tend to be more alive, open, flowing and active. When searching for life’s purpose or true calling, many hit a dead end by seeking to identify a particular vocation or workplace. They often stop their search because these nouns have no vigor. And they’re lacking vigor because they’re lacking guidance. They would be better served to just show up and play. It’s the active doing in life that allows divine guidance to find us in the form of our own intuition. Get in movement and lead with your strengths and see what develops.

What’s one project you could begin playing with today? What do you have to lose by engaging it and seeing what develops? It’s a much wiser strategy than standing pat in frustration.

Your strengths are your hidden advantage and your natural competitive edge. Yet you may never experience the bliss of leading with them if you aren’t willing to invest the time and energy in rigorous self-examination, journaling and reflection. Decide today to leave the weak position of saying you don’t know what to do – or what you want to be when you grow up. Begin this honorable work and grow you will.