Fear Cripples Authenticity

Fear cripples authenticity and once crippled it doesn’t hold enough power to sustain itself.  Our dreams then become like kites without wind. iStock_000007626121XSmall

That’s the problem with compromise. When you settle for less than you know you could have, you poke a little hole in your soul.

We can only take so many hits to our authenticity.  After awhile the only thing that will resurrect it is full bore, courageous, original choices.

My intention in this post is to cause you to pause and see where your compromises are slowly killing you. You have many unknown friends and supporters who await the inspiration of authentic expression that only you can offer.

Yes, we are all unique but there are threads and themes of affinity running through us.  We lift one another by standing tall enough so that others can feel the light from our boldness.

When you stand tall by making an authentic choice, in an area that also inspires me; I stand a little taller too.

We are so close to tipping our world back to authentic harmony.

More and more of us each day are beating the drum of authentic expression.  The biggest obstacle to enjoying such a world is simply the fear of looking like a fool.

But who’s truly the fool?  One who stumbles in sincere authentic expression or one who hides safely behind the insidious mask of trying to fit in?

Because of societal conditioning, the fear of looking like a fool runs like faulty DNA through the fiber of our beings and the only antidote is choosing more authentically, more often.

Pure authenticity is the only thing big enough worth risking the approval of others.  Authenticity requires glorious tribute to individual courage.

When you make the decision to stand tall in your own magnificence you must follow-through and announce it.  Authenticity without expression is a watered down, less powerful force that causes unnecessary internal struggle.

If you’ve been brave but falling short of the mark look and see if you may have been holding back or watering down your expression.

Authenticity is best used in service to transformation.  It’s truly the action of coming back to our most genuine core.  Such genuineness must be seized and asserted with the glory it deserves.

Fear not.  You have what it takes.  Claim the work life you were meant to enjoy and check back here often.  I’ve decided to lead this charge in a much bigger way.

If you want to take full control of your website and stop being held hostage by your webmaster, join a very authentic friend of mine, Suzanne Bird-Harris, for a full week of WordPress Summer Camp, on the phone, to learn everything you need to know to successfully and easily take control of your website. Suzanne is a hoot and a masterful teacher. Check out her surprisingly affordable camp.

Celebrate Your Strangeness

I was engaged in some rapid channel changing and heard a speaker at the Michael Jackson memorial service telling Jackson’s children not to believe that their Dad was strange.  Huh?   This speaker meant well but you and I both know that Jackson was about as strange as one could be. iStock_000006278956XSmall

And his strangeness made him rich.

Being strange and having the courage to express your strangeness is a very good thing.

We tend to revere oddness and weird exceptionality in our celebrities but at the same time caution against standing out from the crowd.

But only good things can happen by being strange.

We need to embrace our strangeness, bring it forth and express it.  In fact our strangeness is the business edge we’ve looking for.

Shopping malls make me want to puke.  Their sameness is depressing.

How likely are you to want to do business with the most common, normal, regular, standard and usual option you can find?

Wouldn’t you rather invest in a relationship with someone astonishing, astounding, atypical, bizarre, curious, different, eccentric, exceptional, extraordinary, fantastic, far-out, marvelous, rare, remarkable, wonderful, or unheard of?

Expressed strangeness can be very good for business.  I understand that many of you struggle declaring a niche.  How about choosing a niche that spotlights your peculiarities?

Here are some of my most sincere wishes.

I wish that we could only fit in by standing out.

I wish it were forbidden to allow fear to stop you.

I wish it were illegal to settle for less than you could be or have.

I wish we were all encouraged to embrace our strangeness from cradle to grave.

Have you been holding back for fear of not fitting it?

We all fall prey to it in one way or another.  I want to encourage you to celebrate your authentic strangeness.

If you’re self-employed, your strangeness could be the only thing that will save your ass.

But strangeness can be a shy, odd cousin who’s been kept in the basement far too long.  You may have to coax it out gradually.  Here are a few hints on how to invite your strangeness out.

1). What do you deeply care about, so much so that you’re willing to take a stand for it?  Identify that and you’ll be better able to identify the specific strangeness that could give you your edge in the marketplace.

2). What eccentricities do you secretly admire about yourself?  If you thought that your pot of gold were at the end of the rainbow of utter transparency –  would you reveal yourself fully?

3). Where do you tend to say screw being cautious, push societal limits and take concepts to the extreme?  Here’s where your big balls are found and we all know the glory that can be seized with a big set of balls.  Don’t fret, if you can identify this extreme it’s a given that you have the strengths and capacity to pull it off.

4). What abnormalities are you curiously attracted to?  Within this area of singular fascination could be the personal breakthrough you’ve been yearning for.

Your commonness is killing you. Being common is boring and unattractive. It’s hard for us to notice the normal you.

Please be your strange self and we’ll love you even more.

In your comment will you answer one of the questions above?  I’ll get us going. Here’s my answer to number 3.

I tend to take authenticity to an extreme wildness.  I abhor appropriateness because I think it’s boring conditioning.  Thus I’ve been called too raw, too direct and even obnoxious.  But I love my raw, fearless nature because it allows me to steadfastly champion my coaching clients who want to blaze trails of their own.

Beliefs Are Bad For Business

Beliefs are sneaky.  Beliefs influence our ability and restrict opportunities often without us even being aware that we have them.  It’s a sound business practice to frequently examine and question your beliefs.

Beliefs can limit flexibility and openness while promoting rigidity.  Rigidity tends to limit opportunity.  Incredibly we often believe things for which we have no proof, especially when it comes to matters of self-assessment.

Belief is putting regard in something as true. This wide range of synonyms astounded me because they all can be used to describe a belief even though they inspire quite different meaning strength.

Synonyms: acceptance, admission, assent, assumption, assurance, avowal, axiom, certainty, conclusion, confidence, conjecture, conviction, credence, credit, deduction, divination, expectation, faith, fancy, feeling, guess, hope, hypothesis, idea, impression, intuition, judgment, knowledge, mind, mindset, notion, opinion, persuasion, position, postulation, presumption, presupposition, profession, reliance, supposition, surmise, suspicion, theorem, theory, thesis, thinking, trust, understanding, view.

Some beliefs can seem very flimsy, especially when we think of a belief as an assumption, a guess, a notion or merely a feeling.

But that’s how all beliefs take root.  We hear someone say something or read it and we assume it to be true.  A statement can be made about your own capacity or about business in general and you could lose out because of your belief in that statement.

Anyone and everyone occasionally can get down on herself or himself.  The good news is that we don’t have to get down and stay there.  Worrying about beliefs is wasteful.  It’s far more productive to use language and questioning to challenge our limiting beliefs.

Worry is an abuse of imagination.  Steve Chandler

Of course not all beliefs are limiting or negative some can be very inspiring.  But even positive beliefs can be limiting.  It makes me question whether we’d be better off without beliefs at all. Would it really matter if we just experienced life in the moment as it comes?

Here are some empowering questions to challeneg and refresh your beliefs.

What do I believe that does not serve me well about my business or myself?

Can I point to proof that supports this belief?

What would I rather believe?

What do I want to believe about my business or myself?

What could I do now to create what I want?

What limiting beliefs would I be better off simply letting go?

What one thing am I creating that uplifts me?

How could I increase my willingness to start fresh with a beginners mind and boldly create that thing?

What’s Your Main Thing?

Your main thing both grounds you and inspires you. istock_000005339131xsmall

Your main thing presents an opportunity for self-honor and personal integrity.

Your main thing must be something that you’d always defend when backed against the wall.

Your main thing emboldens you organically with natural confidence.

Your main thing is the core backbone of your business niche.

If you aren’t sure about your main thing then you may struggle in business.

Do not confuse the business function built around your main thing as your main thing.

My core business function, as a start up coach, is to guide clients through the process of discovering, validating and expressing their main thing in the form of a prosperous business.

But that’s not my main thing.

My main thing is championing uniqueness.  My main thing is encouraging you to express your authentic singularity.

The world needs you to express your magnificent unlikeness.

The independent nature of your makeup is the key to finding and profiting from your authentic sweet spot.

We want to know what makes you different.

We’ll pay you well for your distinctiveness.

What’s your main thing? If you know it will you honor us by sharing it here?

Have an idea for a business and your not sure if it will fly? Then join us for this free phone class, on July 15, to run your idea through the gauntlet.