Authentic Business Building

We’ve all experienced the ready acceptance of affinity.  Having something in common like a similar university experience or hailing from the same neck of the woods seems to create an instantaneous bond that relaxes both parties.

I wonder,  if this occurs because way down deep within we already know that we are one and the affinity just gives us a reason to express our connection?

A Deeper Connection

My experience shows that authenticity can create an even deeper connection than affinity.

Authentic means you bring all of you to the interaction.  No hiding parts of your personality.  No mask wearing.  Simply show up as the real you.  For those of us who value authenticity this is meaningful.

A more genuine connection happens in the expression of that authenticity. A warmness and familiarity builds because you’ve shown up on the same terms with the same intention.

Authentic Business building is more about expressing than impressing.

An authentic connection means that we can count on one another for an intention of mutual highest good.  An authentic connection means more transparency than polish. When all of our interactions both commercial and personal are transparent and above board we can more cleanly make decisions without fear.

 Opportunities Arise on Comfort’s Edge

Everybody likes a good surprise.  We can create a breeding ground for surprises but we must to be willing to accept both pleasant ones and uncomfortable ones.

In my phone classes I’ll often share a point and then offer immediate laser coaching on that tool or issue.

Talk about being the edge of ones comfort zone.   At least for me, network marketing was very uncomfortable because it wasn’t really natural or authentic.  Authentic discomfort is a whole different animal.

When I make that coaching offer in my classes, I have no idea what someone is going to present or how my coaching will be received.    But I like being out there on the edge because on the edge of our comfort zones are where pleasant surprises happen.

Are you perhaps playing it a little too safe?  Nudge yourself a little closer to the cliff.  You might enjoy the authentic aliveness out there.

On the edge of comfort is where the juiciest opportunities present themselves.



  1. Chris Edgar says:

    Hi Tom — I can definitely relate to that feeling of having no idea what attitude people are going to bring to a talk I’m giving. And then my sense of what people are thinking tends to be completely off as well. People whose eyes seem glazed over are usually the ones who come up to me afterward and tell me how helpful it was.

  2. I really like this. People so often overlook how a little bit of authenticity or real, human empathy can go a long way. Good stuff.
    .-= mongoose´s last blog ..Vintage 26 Bmx Mongoose Mtb Oldschool =-.

  3. Chris – That’s why I like interactive talk. With participation we can quit guessing about connection. At least with those who participate.

    Mongoose – Welcome. Come back for more. Authenticity is what I mostly write about.

    Yst – Welcome. Glad you also know the value of living life on the edge.

  4. Harmony- SEO White Rock says:

    I read more often than I comment, but I must applaud your phrase

    “Authentic Business building is more about expressing than impressing.”

    You remind me of the lessons learned in a group study where we focused on attraction rather than promotion.

    The principle being if we come from an intentional power within, our external environment will conform and even attract that which is coherent with our intention.

    To be honest, it is one of the reasons I so enjoy the work I do.
    .-= Harmony- SEO White Rock´s last blog ..White Rock SEO in Danger =-.

  5. Harmony – Always good to see your smiling face. Wait a minute where’s you Avatar go? Best of everything with your new focus on SEO. Yes an intentional power is obviously one based on awareness and careful decision. I like what you’ve shared.

  6. Hi Tom,

    Nice post, I agree. Obviously being authentic most start from within. Life’s an inner game. Everything hinges on the self, so self mastery is the key. As humans, we’re given the ability to think at a higher level. Unfortunately, often we don’t. At least not in the way we were designed to. For many, ‘free will’ or ‘free thinking’ is just their belief system in disguise.

    When we become more (of our-self), we need less. And the control is in letting go of the control. Trying to control only reinforces what we’re trying to escape from. Some wisdom from the Tao; “true sayings seem contradictory. Act by not acting. Do by not doing. The master accomplishes much without doing”. Much of life is the undoing of something that shouldn’t have been done. Know thyself, and self mastery is the key.

  7. Amir Mahmoud says:

    I struggled for so long to building an authentic business and I just love what you wrote here in the post. In fact, I was almost done with my blog post and what you wrote inspired me to incorporate new ideas…

    I just love what you’re doing Tom… It’s incredible, keep it going! 🙂


  1. Authenticity, not affinity, the deeper reason for career success says:

    […] coach who specializes in helping workers transition from employment to owning a small business. He writes: We’ve all experienced the ready acceptance of affinity. Having something in common like a […]

Speak Your Mind