Fearless Living

56 Comments


scan0003I want to inspire you to do something today from the raw, unblemished core of who you are.  I want to encourage you to act for today or even for one hour, as if there were nothing wrong with you.  I want you to boldly go where no man or woman has gone because only you can walk your path.

I’m asking you to do that because you can.

Abundance is doing what you can do right now.  Kim George

What stops you from living fearlessly?

What stops you from doing what you say you want to do?

My thoughts stop me.

What if everything brave and beautiful that you’ve ever wanted to create was stopped by a fearful thought?

We have become masters of fearful thinking.  We’re experts at labeling our maladies.

We call them procrastination, perfectionism, attention deficit disorder, overwhelm.

By labeling them we invite their existence, and by doing so we sentence ourselves to an unnecessary, more permanent experience of them.

I like this about my upbringing.  We didn’t have a lot of money so we couldn’t afford to label our maladies.  We sneezed, but we didn’t know about allergies.  As a result, we grew up allergy free.

At six years old, I slid down a muddy hillside and gashed a long, deep wound in my thigh.  Spending money for a doctor just wasn’t an option.  My parents cleaned it, disinfected it and wrapped it.  I felt taken care of and my leg healed, without a stitch.

We tell these stories now and laugh.  Home healing gets passed on.  Also at six years, my daughter Leslie, (that’s her in the air) ran and slid up on an old picnic bench.  A finger length sliver of wood splintered off in her rump.  I gave her the choice of a doctor visit or a Barbie Doll, if I pulled it out.  She chose the doll.

Reflecting now, I see that our greater gift was not the medical savings but the gift of acting swiftly without needing to slow down and label experiences as something bad.

I made a wonderful discovery when my kids were toddlers.  They’d fall down and smack their heads.  But in that instant of surprise, they’d look to us before reacting.  If we laughed they were infected by our laughter.  But if we showed concern, they cried.  As a result, they learned that pain wasn’t always bad.  Often pain is only surprising, until we label it as something else, by attaching a fearful thought to it.

Like many of you, I’ve worked through the emotional wounds of a less than nurturing upbringing.  But I think we are too quick to label our conditioning as limiting.  When we look for the good, we can see it.  I now see that my upbringing also spawned my natural optimism.

I’ve often been called unrealistic.  Harsher critics have said I’m avoiding, or in denial. They’re right.  I’m denying the need to explore what’s wrong with me.

I think it’s a waste of time.  I know it’s a waste of life.

We’ve made our temporary disorders more permanent by accepting them as our fate.  We say, “I have” a cold, like we own it.  We describe colds as though they have taken up permanent residence in our bodies.  Wouldn’t it be better to tell the truth?  Wouldn’t we be better off saying?  “The experience of a cold is now leaving my body.”

We declare, “I’m overwhelmed.”  “I’m a procrastinator.”  We describe ourselves as if our core identity is flawed.  These fearful labels are not who we are, but they have become misdiagnoses because we have thought them into being.

They become excuses and even bigger personal puzzles that we think we have to solve in order to be get what we want.

But really, haven’t we made all of this up?  Yes, thoughts are creative and most of us have advanced degrees in negative thinking.  But positive thinking isn’t the best answer either.

How about simply more acting and less thinking?

When we are living, we are creating.  We aren’t thinking but doing.

We fear the idea of something more than the thing itself.  Steve Chandler

Our minds are tricky and powerful.  We can believe that we “have” anything. We can believe that we can think our way out of any problem.  But while thinking so much, are we really living?

What might you create if you didn’t “have” anything?  No malady, disorder or disease, and not a single impediment, block or fearful thought?

Act.  Do.  Create.  Walk your bold path today.

Fearless Creators

Steve Chandler his book, Fearless, Creating the Courage to Change the Things You Can, inspired this post.  I’ve joined his Club Fearless and you can get his book free by joining.  This isn’t an affiliate program; this recommendation is my thanks to Steve for the inspiration to live fearlessly.

Davina Haisell for having the courage to try something new and create The Quote Effect.

Marelisa Fábrega for her relentless dedication to creativity.

Comments

  1. Thanks Tom,

    I really identify with how ‘limiting’ it can be to make a particular circumstance or condition our identity – and how freeing it is when we allow ourselves to notice and release these beliefs. Indeed, What IF we believed we don’t ‘have’ anything we haven’t on some level of consciousness agreed to have? And if we have invited it or become married to it, we can say bu-bye to just as easily – without guilt or self-blame, but with a new feeling of empowerment.

    I’m hosting a radio show today – and I’m taking these powerful thoughts with me!

    peace,
    Jade

  2. Act more and think less. Useful advice.

    So is reflecting on stuck patterns (where we have that, “Why does this always happen?” or “Not again”) and then acting differently.

    Just acting can become being unkind to ourselves.

    Evans last blog post..Belief, Certainty and Agreement

  3. Jarrod - Warrior Development says:

    “How about simply more acting and less thinking?”

    Right on!

    I totally believe that thinking is grossly overrated and needs to take much more of a back seat role in day to day living. Providing people can distinguish between intuition and other drives that become more obvious when thinking dissipates somewhat.

  4. A finger long splinter, wow. Sound like you have a tough little daughter.

    I agree with this post. We focus on what’s wrong instead of what’s right. When we go toward what’s right we bring more of it into our lives.

    I struggled with becoming a confident writer. When I let go of what I thought was a good writer and just focused on giving value I became a good writer.

    We all need to focus on the greatness that we have and let it explode into the world without fear of what others think.

    Karl Staib – Work Happy Nows last blog post..The Necessity of Giving Gratitude at Work

  5. As an analyzer and logic seeker I absolutely agree with more doing, less thinking. I also believe that situation is “good” or “bad” because we decided to label it as such. What if we simply kept on with our lives instead of labeling and hence getting stuck. It makes sense – these labels are judgments rather than just accepting the situation for what it is and moving on.

    To answer your early question – the only thing that stops me is me…that is taking responsibility for my life. I don’t think most people believe that, there is a tendency to place blame elsewhere.

    We do need to focus more on our good – there is great power in that.

  6. Excellent points, Tom. Thank you.

    ‘be bold and mighty forces will come to your aid’—Basil King

    “There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.” – from Hamlet , Wm. Shakespeare; Act II, scene ii

    Blessings and continued inspiration,
    CG

    CG Walterss last blog post..CelebraZine 13Feb09

  7. I so agree with you! Fabulous post. Mind you I made an effort to avoid that anxious gasp whenever my young children hurt themselves so they didn’t get the immediate message, ‘Let’s all feel sorry for Sarah,’ or whoever it was. Unfortunately that gasp response seemed to be inextricably connected to my reflexes so I was much slower at averting a fall or a bump. Ah well, at least they didn’t experience as much pain from all those extra accidents I let them have.

    Also, I have found an advantage in giving people/conditions labels. My grandson is autistic and I was very resistant to attaching that label to him when it first arose. But eventually it allowed him entry to a school especially for autistic children and its so much easier in public to have a one-word explanation for why he doesn’t behave the way people expect. One day, if I have anything to do with it, we won’t have to have labels to make people’s individual foibles acceptable to us.

  8. Hi Tom. I’ve seen this many times, when toddler falls there is that first look of shock on their face and they turn to their parent to “see” how they should react. When the parent gasps and grabs hold of them, the screams start. So true! Youngsters are indeed fearless until we show them otherwise.

    Thank you for sharing The Quote Effect here… and for being a part of it too! Cheers.

    Davinas last blog post..Ebook Launch: The Quote Effect Arrives

  9. The post is truly inspiring and I absolutely love the pic.

    ‘Act. Do. Create. Walk your bold path today.’ – I might quote this line someday.

    Avani-Mehtas last blog post..How To Create Lasting Relationships

  10. You must be one tough kid when you were young. Your little girl too. I guess it explains why you are now in the profession of teaching others move past their fears and to live an authentic life.

    I like the idea of taking some unconventional routes. I’d have my jitters. But I guess I look forward to the new experience.

    Evelyn Lims last blog post..What The Movie Benjamin Button Taught Me About Time

  11. Hi Tom,

    This was an excellent post. I love the picture and smiled when I read that it was your daughter. Great job with the post and with raising your kids to be fearless!

    Daphnes last blog post..Having It All, Losing It All

  12. Jade – Welcome! Keep going deep my friend, freedom rings!

    Evan – Patterns are great trails for discovery. I’m sure you know that I’m no advocating blind action or no thinking. Just less thinking.

    Jarrod – Excellent observation, we do hear our intuition more clearly once we silence the chatter in our minds.

    Karl – Yes! Focus on what’s working well! It may appear to be toughness but I think her choice was more based on trust in her dad.

    Stacey – Powerful observation, perhaps that is the only thing that can stop us – our own limitations.

    C.G. – You are the Quote Master. Two grand ones there.

    Hillary – Welcome! Sounds like you practiced conscious parenting as well. I understand what you mean about your grandson. Labels can serve well for quick explanations as long as they are not limiting the one who was labeled.

    Davina – All of us arrive here with a natural fearlessness. It’s still within us waiting to be free.

    Avani – Quote away. Thanks the picture is one of my favorites. I still enjoy toddler tossing but mothers are as trusting of it anymore and I’ve never dropped a kid. :)

    Evelyn – I really never thought of myself as tough for being treated in that way. It just was. No big deal, I have a wider scar on my leg but greater confidence in my being.

    Daphne – Thanks very much. My daughters and I are far from fearless but we are highly confident of our capabilities and all have a good sense of adventure.

  13. Bravo Tom, Bravo! THAT is exactly how life needs to be lived!
    The passage about the children falling also strong confirmation for me that is what I do with my nieces and nephews when they fall, and I have done this instinctually from the first fall and all is always fine. They get up and laugh and then continue like nothing happened.
    Again I say bravo!
    Coryelle

    Coryelle Kramer~Animal Communicators last blog post..The Buffalo Medicine Card and Abundance of Constrast

  14. We declare, “I’m overwhelmed.” “I’m a procrastinator.” We describe ourselves as if our core identity is flawed.

    Ok…I’ve got a problem with this. May just be semantics, but let’s find out. To say, “I’m overwhelmed” is to describe a state. And yes, I suppose that’s putting a label on it, nonetheless, but it feels different to me than to say, “I am a procrastinator.”

    From a different tack, it’s one thing to look out the window and say, “it’s raining, (I’m overwhelmed)” and a completely different matter to say, “God, this weather sucks! (I’m a procrastinator.)”

    Maybe I’ve just gotten to the place in my life where I appreciate rainy days and the gifts they bring that are just different than those of sunny days. So, too, I can think of several ways it’s wonderful to be overwhelmed. I’m experiencing one of them now.

    I guess I’ve just outed myself as someone who’s learning that it really IS ‘thinking that makes it so’…because for me, it’s important to own my own stuff and say in present moment language, “I am this…” or “I am that…”. It’s just as important for me not to go off the deep end of extrapolation and conclusion and translate those states of being into labels that limit me. It’s all temporary. All of it.

  15. When I was in university I studied Irish and Scots Gaelic. One thing that I loved about both languages was the way people don’t own things (eg. they are with us) and the we are aren’t things (eg. hunger is upon us).

    In a culture where war and the sea can take it all away from you in a blink of an eye, I can understand how the language developed that way.

    When I starting being overwhelmed or thinking a lot about the stuff I own, I think of Gaelic and relax.

  16. Hi, Tom, this is such a wise and powerful post you’ve written, on so many levels. What we teach… how we are being… how we think of ourselves on the surface… how we’re more powerful—and freer—when we see our true selves and the true nature of a moment. This is one to be read several times, for deep-seated understanding. Thank you!

    @ Alex — Thanks for sharing the understanding about Gaelic. What a wise way of seeing things. The early Native Americans also believed people didn’t own things.

    Julies last blog post..The Unexpected

  17. Tom, the first word out of my mouth when I read this was, “Whoa!”, and much in the same manner as that big turtle in Finding Nemo…(!). But anyhoo…

    You are so on the mark with this post. And it fits with a saying I came across and am trying to apply at every occasion – “Acknowledge the fear and do it anyway.” If we spend too much time thinking about why we can’t do something we will never do it. While fear can be a good thing in certain situations, like believing you can fly, it most certainly holds us back 99% of the time.

    And then again, maybe we can fly…

    Blessings!
    Keena

    Keenas last blog post..Inspiration or Motivation?

  18. Hi Tom

    This post really hits one and takes the breath away.
    For a moment it even took away all of those “haves” of mine.

    You are describing true freedom.

    I think you know what I am going to try and do with this…

    Juliet

    LifeMadeGreat | Juliets last blog post..Overcoming The Barriers Of Introversion: Starting The Process

  19. Good stuff.

    I don’t think labeling is the enemy. It’s the meaning we make or the actions we take. In fact, I think precision and accuracy are key tools of the trade for improving results.

    To balance it out, I think the key is to label what’s right with us.

    I’m a fan of testing myself and getting back up when I get knocked down. I think the problem is trying to avoid getting knocked down. I think the key skill is getting back up faster.

    J.D. Meiers last blog post..Avoid Mental Burnout

  20. Coryelle – Welcome, seems like we are raising a generation of fearless little ones. How exciting!

    Suzanne – Okay, Okay, I got you in the first paragraph. :) Your distinction is noted and understood. I think you are right and what you point out is more than just semantical hair splitting. However, even with overwhelm we could say I’m temporarily experiencing overwhelm. Or overwhelm is with me, thanks Alex. ;) Suz you may be able to withstand those proclamations, I know I’m weaker and will sometimes use the label, even of a state of being , as an excuse to quit. What did you like about this post? :)

    Alex – Powerful addition, thank you. My Mom is from Australia and her ancestors were Scotch on both sides so perhaps I’ve been blessed with that Gaelic wisdom.

    Julie – Your praise warms my heart. Thank you. :)

    Keena – I’m with you all the way. I’d much rather believe and act. Fear is paralyzing.

    Juliet – Indeed I do know. ;) To heck with try – get in the midst of it and enjoy the doing.

    J.D. – You are a very wise man. I agree with you, it’s the negative labeling that slows us down. Acknowledging what’s right is a grand practice. You have also hit on a central key to fearless living, getting up faster. Often the once “bad” things become good over time, so speed just lessens the suffering. Well said J.D.

  21. Thanks for really making me take a step back. I love the part about how by labeling things like procrastination and “being overwhelmed” we allow ourselves to be that way.

    Really turns the tables. No, I’m not a victim! Or, I’m a victim of my own excuses. I can do something about that.

    When you realize you’re in control of the situation, you can fix it. And even before you fix it, you feel better knowing you’re in control!

    Thanks again; this one needs to go on my wall.

    Jason Cohens last blog post..Starting up while employed: Admit it

  22. Act. 100% with you!
    Think less act more. Revise and improve.
    Talk is a poor substitution to action.
    Learn from failures, repeat successes. Share both on your blog ;)

  23. I can’t even count the times when I’ve been accused of “not thinking!” I never took umbrage but wondered how one could truly stop thinking anyway?

    I say there is time for both thinking and action…let’s just not pit one up against the other!

    Thanks for an invigorating post, Tom! :~)

  24. Really great post Tom. We do have so much influence on how our children deal with their fear and even at times what they will interpret as scary or upsetting. An important reminder.

    For some reason your post made me think of the movie Amistad. There is a scene where we learn that in the native language of the prisoners there is no word for try. I think our fears cause us far too often to try instead of do. What might be possible if we did not have the notion of “to try” for our fear to leverage? In the immortal words of Yoda “do or do not there is no try.”

  25. Extremely motivational post.
    Don’t acknowledge the fear and it won’t become you!
    I love it!

  26. Hi Tom: Thank you for the mention, I’m fearless, yay! I’ve read that in countries where there are no laws giving compensation for so-called whiplash when someone is in a car accident, there are far less cases of whiplash than in those countries where the “victim” is compensated. I think that relates to your point that we look to others and to society at large to help us decide what just happened to us in any given situation.

  27. Wow, what a great way of looking at all the negative labels that surround us and paralyze us from acting.

    Labeling often causes us to exaggerate the problem, become further aware of it, and like you said: resign yourself to its permanent residence inside your body.

    If we can avoid labels for a minute and try to experience something just for the sheer thrill or enjoyment of it, there is probably so much more we’d be able to accomplish in both our business and personal lives.

    Thanks for the post!

    Matt Thomass last blog post..How to Avoid Getting Trapped at a Job

  28. I saw that picture in the email and smiled, what a wonderful picture for this topic (she is smiling away; fearless) and then you mentioned it was your daughter and I smiled more (no wonder it’s perfect picture lol).

    Fearless risktakers are the way makers. In other words, the people who give this world much needed change are the risktakers. You can only be as helpful to others and yourself as the risks you are willing to take. Risktakers are the ones who step outside the box, push themselves past their comfort zones, and often demonstrates that there are no limits. All of human beings progress rests in the hands of the courageous fearless risktakers.

    Indeed when we label ourselves, we play out that label as fact. When you choose to believe in a fact (or truth) then you manifest the enforcement of that reality and manifest the proof for the truth as well. Whatever you believe to be truth will manifest self-proof because of the belief. It does not matter what you believe, if you believe it then you see all kinds of evidence and proof to keep believing it. Finding truth is an illusion since all your going to find is what you already created. When you view what you already created, you are viewing from perception. Perception creates reality and when you observe your perception as fact, then your setting your perception into place. When your perception is part of your reality, then you will continue to create that perception as reality by simply observing it as fact. We are all out own self-fulfilling-prophecies and in this, there really is no risks. Once you understand this, fear melts away.

    Fantastically written article :)

    Nicholas Powiulls last blog post..Powiull Sleep Day 10-11 (Adopting Powiull Sleep: Different Methods): by Nicholas Powiull

  29. Hi Tom – What a beautiful post. Just the other day I was thinking of how young children will fall and get back up, never giving up until they accomplish their goal. Like you said, they haven’t been subjected to the conditioning adults have. It’s amazing how much we can learn from the young. It makes me wonder if we need to go full circle before we “get it right”. After reading your post, I’m thinking, maybe so.

    The awesome photo of your daughter is the perfect compliment to your words. :)

    Barbara Swaffords last blog post..Bloggers – CareTakers Of The WWW

  30. G’day I like what you’re saying here. I think you’re pretty spot on.
    I’m not big on attachment to things;Ways of being that don’t serve us. I’m certainly practising at shedding useless stress.
    It’s possible that you might enjoy reading Bill Harris. If you don’t already know of him then just Google and I’m sure you’ll find what you’re meant to :-)
    He writes often in his blog about the illusions we create with our internal maps of reality….. thinking.

    My experience of being a parent has encouraged me to move faster on living a more harmonious life…………

    On positive thinking……… I agree give it a rest. I think we’ve become well trained monkeys on that one and can sometimes just be blanketing the manure!

    enough ramble from me.

    I like your blog and have particularly enjoyed this post today.

    Best wishes :-) gotta go fly a kite!

  31. Greetings Tom!
    A stir in the pot of mindfulness. Being fully present in the present on purpose, no thinking or rumination required. This allows me to act and create in the moment; there are no other choices. I will be discussing this at a talk on “Overwhelmed and Burned Out”on 3/18 at Panera in Waterworks. Great to see you at the PCA luncheon!
    Exceptional post – I enjoyed all the references to medicine!

  32. Jason – That’s a beautiful realization – we can all let go of our victim hood.

    Alik – I knew you were an action guy!

    Henie – Of course it’s the over-thinking that gets to us. When I get fired up I sound a bit more absolute than my intention. :)

    Susan – Yeah Yoda! I’d forgotten that about Amistad. It makes me wonder if our obsessive culture has perverted our language.
    This is the third different example of more accurate thinking coming from other cultures.

    Grog – Welcome – Act Now!

    Mare – Yes you are fearless! I love your example. I’ve also read that in nations without traffic laws there are less accidents. Perhaps we regulate way too much. Damn those Puritans!

    Matt – I’m all for finding the thrill and the joy in action. Those are wonderful reframes and like you said, all it takes a reflective pause.

    Nicholas – “You can only be as helpful to others and yourself as the risks you are willing to take.” I love that statement, thank you and thank you for your wonderful lesson on perception.

    Barbara – Indeed we go back to where we’ve started and find that it was all about the journey. Glad you enjoyed the picture.
    I was only limited by my strength in throwing her and ceiling heights. Leslie never said stop. :)

    Ribbon – Welcome. I’ve enjoyed your comments on other blogs and you beat me to a visit. I’ll stop by and catch your kite flying later. :) Thanks for the recommendation to Bill, I’ll check him out as well.

    Shawn – Welcome. It’s more than nice to see you here. Thanks; I wasn’t even aware that I referenced medicine so much. All the best in your talk; I’m sure they will love you!

  33. I’ve had two people comment in the past 48 hours that “fear” has crept into my language. I’m glad they pointed it out to me, because upon deeper introspection I must admit that fear has indeed become “more permanent by accepting them as our fate.”

    It began with being “terrified” that my 18 year old son isn’t ready for the responsibilities that await him when he goes off to college this fall.

    That “fear” has been manifesting itself in my thinking for a few months now. However, recently it’s begun to spread and manifest itself in other areas – as evidenced by the words I choose to use.

    Just like cancer doesn’t limit itself to a single organ – fear doesn’t confine itself to one “compartment” of your life. My carefully isolate nugget of fear has begun to “metastasize” and spread to other areas.

    Oops – there I go talking medicine as well!!! I guess when the blog is about the mind/body connection – it’s only natural that the discussions about healing of the mind can only lead to references to medicine!

    Maybe you should change the name of your blog to the Dr of Delightful Work!!!

    Kathy | Virtual Impaxs last blog post..The shit fight is beginning- should you join in?

  34. I want to inspire you to do something today from the raw, unblemished core of who you are. I want to encourage you to act for today or even for one hour, as if there were nothing wrong with you. I want you to boldly go where no man or woman has gone because only you can walk your path.

    I’m asking you to do that because you can.

    Abundance is doing what you can do right now. Kim George

    You are enough….

    PS….you are a litlle bit unrealistic, sweetie….but I like it any ways….

  35. Thank You, TOM!!!

  36. My interesting thing for the day was I jumped in a snow bank.

    After reading this book awhile back, it recommends that we do one thing a day that scares us.

    I rarely get around to doing one thing a day that scares us. But I would like to. And I think we all should.

    Now if I could just find the time to do 1 hour a day of fearless living.

    Sarahs last blog post..Beginners Opinion of Yoga

  37. Hi Tom

    I enjoy to challenge myself in doing things that scare. When I was in college I fear public speaking, so I enroll myself in a lot publish speaking classes. Today, I am a speaker. English is my second language, so I know that I don’t write or spell correctly. So I write a blog daily now, and I will be publish my book (with the help of editor) by the end of this year.
    So, your blog post is music to my ears.
    Thank you,
    Giovanna Garcia
    Imperfect Action is better than No Action

    Giovanna Garcias last blog post..Is Susie Winfrey better than Oprah Winfrey?

  38. Sarah…

    I loved that you jumped into a snow bank! :~) On purpose, I hope! I would love to jump into a snow bank but highly unlikely to happen in SoCal! So jealous! :~)

    Thanks, Tom, for providing this platform!

    Henies last blog post..A Day Without

  39. I love being fearlessly creative. The energy it gives me is awesome. It is really a kind of spiritual moment when I open the flood gates and let the creative juices flow. On the other hand, I am my own worst enemy putting off things that I am unsure of. Procrastinating….. I’ve been doing that with a small project and now I have to get it done before Tuesday! I don’t want to screw it up! EEEK!

  40. Thought I would share a poem I wrote on courage – seemed appropriate given this post and all the great comments I have been reading here. Bonus – the photo was compliments of our friend @Henie.

    http://randomactsofleadership.wordpress.com/2009/01/29/a-moment-of-courage-part-ii/

    Susan Mazzas last blog post..Four Chords to Innovation

  41. Hi Tom – I think you describe many people very well – the ones who don’t want to change (ie grow). These people actually like having lots of problems, eg illness, don’t like their job, money problems, because having lots of anything gives them a sense of security, bizarre as it sounds. They won’t let their problems go in a hurry, and discussing them with counsellors doesn’t work very well because they just end up labelling their problems, so they can enjoy having them more.

    They even think they are brave and bold because they endure so many problems! This personality type is described very well in Jan Spiller’s book Astrology For The Soul, chapter 8. Handy reading if you know someone like this and wonder what to say to them.

    Cheers Tom!

    Robins last blog post..Finding Our True Selves

  42. Kathy – Good analogy of two insidious dis-eases. The good news is that being fearless is the same as being present. Once we pause to check we are already there. Surrogate EFT tapping for your sun will make him ready and ease your mind.

    Diane – “Unrealistic” I absolutely hate that word! It ought to be banned form the English language. First of all, it’s entirely subjective. What you may consider unrealistic may be a regular occurrence for me. Secondly it tends to keep us playing small.

    Sarah – Very cool, I’ll bet just by selecting a fearless hour each day you could take one small action that was fearless like calling someone and asking for something that you want. It doesn’t have to be extra time. Do something within the time you already have.

    Giovanna – Your command of the language will come over time. You already have the courage and warmth so I’m sure your audiences will receive your creative endeavors well.

    Henie – It’s my pleasure – there must be a snowbank equivalent for you somewhere. Look for something you don’t see people doing every day. Fearlessness has many angles and Sarah hit upon one that proves she doesn’t care about what others think.

    Laurie – You’ll come through. Have you considered that you like the drama of deadlines? I used to have a terrible addiction to adrenaline until I learned to get a jump on things.

    Susan – Your poem is welcome here any time. It’s very apt to this discussion as is Henie’s brilliant photo.

    Robin – I’m sorry to hear that there is a whole category of those spineless folks. Yikes! It’s a good thing that astrological diagnoses like that are reversible with courage.

  43. Tom,

    Pardon my “french” but sometimes, when I’m in that rut, I say to myself “What heck am I doing?” Well, I don’t use the word heck but you get the idea. I buckle down, shake off my funk and move forward. I know I can do what I have to do. I just gotta focus ya know.

  44. Hi Tom — I liked what you said about giving up on obsessing over what’s wrong with us. What came up for me when I read that was that the easiest way for me to give that up is to stop thinking about any aspect of myself as “wrong.” It’s related to something I’ve been thinking about recently — that maybe one aspect of maturity is giving up the idea that God is going to come and tell us we did a good or bad job, and becoming able to live with uncertainty. Best, Chris

    Chris Edgar | Purpose Power Coachings last blog post..Upcoming “Productive Mind And Heart” Talk

  45. There are times in my life when I can say that I was fearless enough to assert what I want not minding the challenges or hurdles that come along the way. I think when you are fixed and focused, nothing can stop you from doing what you believe in.

    Anna

  46. Tom,

    I enjoyed reading the post. What a great read !!! I can truly relate to your post. I think it is so true. I can remember when I was little and playing at our neighbors. Well, I fell and had this hugh piece of glass in my leg. No, I did not go to the doctors. My father fixed me up! I am working on my fearless living once again as an adult. Thanks for your words of wisdom.

  47. Ricardo – Wise my man. Asking a tough question will always show us the way out of a rut.

    Chris – That’s insightful. We are “all”-right! I agree, my God doesn’t judge either. :) So why wait for what’s not coming?

    Kim – Welcome, good to see you here. Fearless living is a choice and I’m inspired that you’ve made it.

  48. “I like this about my upbringing. We didn’t have a lot of money so we couldn’t afford to label our maladies. We sneezed, but we didn’t know about allergies. As a result, we grew up allergy free.”

    Tom – this is brilliant and so true. When I had PTSD, they focused on the problem, so they could give me a label. And in addition to focusing on that problem – which I really wanted to forget, they also wanted to dig up every single shit thing that had happened to me since the age of two.

    I didn’t begin to recover, until I stopped focusing on the shit and working towards the positive things that I wanted to happen.

    By the way, I know your healthcare is expensive – but in many ways it’s more sensible than our system. I know folk who go to the doctor’s for the slightest thing because it’s free. My ex-mother in law has had virtually every single bit of her body x-rayed and scanned, because of imaginary illnesses.

    Cath Lawsons last blog post..You May Not Be Doing As Badly As You Think….

  49. wow thats a powerful post and beautifully written too. Thank you:-)

    Chelsea Elms last blog post..Ice Breaker: Untie Knots

  50. Cath – In so many areas of our lives we need to focus on what’s working well. Traditional medicine unfortunately is set up to treat symptoms thus they look for them. I can see what you mean about your social medicine. We see some of that hear as well. Everyone tends to appreciate more when they reach into their own pockets to pay for something.

    Chelsea – Welcome, it’s my pleasure to powerfully inspire.

  51. Tom — I liked your words, “Reflecting now, I see that our greater gift was not the medical savings but the gift of acting swiftly without needing to slow down and label experiences as something bad.”

    I think it is really true that if we label something as bad, it becomes so. This is something we need to stop and think about, especially regarding our children.

    Thanks for a great post :~)

    Saras last blog post..More than just 5 words in a journal

  52. Yeah, there is nothing impossible with use if we just believe. Believing just some kind of power we can have and hold. If we just believe then everything will be fine. Thanks for this very nice and inspiring blog.

  53. I’m glad I found your site and appreciate your post. For at least an hour today, I’m going to act as if “I am well” (one of my mantras). I’ve lived with cancer for the past year and a bit, and fall into the high risk category for recurrence and metastases. I realize that fear is limiting my life, perhaps as much as my current physical limitations. Yet more than ever I want to be living life to the fullest extent possible. “I am fearless” is now another mantra of mine!

  54. Lou, Welcome to Club Fearless. I’m honored to count you among those who have chosen to create their lives anew.

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