Is Your Business Authentic?

iStock_000007279757XSmallYou may have noticed the hullabaloo around authentic business building lately. Most businesses can’t pull it off because it’s like trying to put a suit on an ape.  No matter how sharp the suit the ape wearing it is still a monkey.

If 60-80% of your employees are unhappy in their work it’s impossible to be an authentic business without expressing authentically.  To make such a business authentic they’d have to say, “We hate our jobs but we’re here to serve you for as long as we can stand it.”

This is where we solo practitioners have a positional advantage. Since we are the business we can engage and express every aspect of business building authentically. Our edge is our individuality.

Instead of searching for a profitable franchise or a high cash flow business to buy why not discover your true calling and build a business around that calling?

What aspect of being authentic challenges you the most?  What aspect of your authenticity in action requires the most courage, focus and boldness?

Which of the following authentic business building activities challenge your genuineness?

1). Choosing to play the biggest possible game.
2). Communicating your message transparently and directly.
3). Delivering your service with an openhearted intention for the highest good of all.
4). Asking for a fee that reflects the inherent value in the service and honors all.
5). Following a marketing strategy that enthuses you because it reflects your personality and values.
6). Setting policies and operating your business in ways that make you feel clean.

By engaging your uniqueness – you are the business, so the business is as authentic as you are.  It takes a really big set to be who you are frequently and consistently but that’s the only way to be completely fulfilled and wealthy.   Authenticity is extremely attractive.

I like to call it being authentic all the way, in every way.

Regular readers know that I’ve committed to my one true path since mid August.  It’s my calling to seek out all those who want to connect their link between authenticity and abundance and help them become fulfilled and rich by expressing their true calling.  I’ll be delivering both virtual and live events to make this happen.  The first live Big Link Rally is January 2, 2010 in Pittsburgh.

So what do you find challenging about being yourself, all the way, in every way?   Choosing too small is one trap that wastes a lot of effort and good intentions.

Callings come from within.  Your link with abundance simply can’t be reconnected without the authentic expression of your boldest and biggest dream.  But discovering and expressing your true calling is much more than simply committing to a dream, business or career objective.

That’s only the beginning. Since everything counts to move you either forward or backward authentically, every aspect of your work must be chosen authentically.

You can’t fully reconnect your link between authenticity and abundance without being completely genuine at every possible turn.

This means that you must create the intention and act in ways that honor your natural preferences and personality quirks.  You must act, think and express as the once bold creator you were before toxic conditioning pushed you back inside yourself.

You must express, your most authentic idea, brought out in service to those you most want to serve, in a way that pumps you up.

Every characteristic about the expression of your true calling must be authentic to you.  The more authentic it is – the greater chance it has of being abundantly profitable and wildly fulfilling.

I offer this warning because too many folks try to compromise on their calling and then they wonder why the money doesn’t follow.  Or they wonder why it takes so much effort.

Or they seem close but don’t understand what they need to adjust.  Often it is because they have chosen a lesser dream.  They have tried to lessen the risk by being and playing smaller than their true self and that just won’t work.

But many choose a calling well and then fail to be authentic all the way in every way.

All the way, in every way, I’m doing it my way. Mantra on Big Link Rally t-shirts.

That means all expression must come from a place of deep personal preference so that it reflects your own style, personality and power.  Yep and that includes the marketing.

Spiritual solo practitioners can be very authentic in their choice of business but at the same time be very inauthentic when it comes to marketing. How can your marketing be inauthentic?

One common breach of good sense is when an authentic business owner chooses to follow a marketing system or strategy that she doesn’t really support.  When this occurs the owner’s link between authenticity and abundance remains severed since she’s fighting the very strategy she’s trying to use.

Here’s a very big clue for you.  Find your point of resistance and allow that direction to show you where you need even more authenticity.

If you’ve always resisted developing essential marketing expertise it’s silly to try and push through a campaign that you don’t believe in.

Instead look at your point of resistance and ask this question.  “How could I accomplish my objective and communicate service to my market in a way that expresses my natural enthusiasm?”

The world needs you to be you in your business.

The world needs you to deliver the very best that you can and to ask for support.   If you’ve always been challenged with self-promotion or with asking for business go back and see if you’re really following your calling.

Go within for the biggest, hairiest dream that scares the living shit right out of you and share that with a world that is waiting to make you rich.

Join me on October 15, 6:00 PM New York time for this powerful and free wake-up call:   Validating Your True Calling.   Enroll here.

The True Calling Connection

Unity - People putting hands togetherTrue callings are big, ballsy and boldly uplifting. True callings invite you to ride a wave of reconnection that simply doesn’t allow small thinking.

Yes I’m talking about reconnecting your original link between authenticity (expressed true calling) and abundance but I’m also referring to a second reconnection – the deep connection of authentic souls to one another.

I want to talk about that second reconnection today.   My big idea is to create and facilitate experiential events where we accelerate the probability of fully engaged participants reconnecting their original link between expressed authenticity (true calling) and abundance.  The first ever live Big Link Rally is scheduled for January 2, 2010 in Pittsburgh Pennsylvania.

This original reconnection will occur sooner for each individual by linking together and creating present moment systems of deep trust.  It’s the connection to one another that opens us up to more vibrant life possibilities and makes a true calling become more evident.   Systems in nature evolve toward symbiotic relationships.  You want examples? Just look at the plants/flowers/bees/birds/seeds cycle.

People systems built on trust and mutual intent also provide order, support and stability.  Within such systems information is freely shared and dreams are nurtured.  The openness and playfulness of the group encourages even deeper connection and even more intentional self-honor.

Do you see how this connection to one another was weakened while growing up?  Our natural trust for one another was instead replaced by the fears of cultural conditioning.  These fears severed our support for one another and in the process severed our link to natural prosperity.

Our blessing of individual uniqueness ought to be all the proof we need to understand that the traditional business game of conformity, scarcity and competition is a myth.  Of course its dog eat dog if everyone is trying to eat the same dog. That game is only played and never really won, by those who fear their individuality.

Choose uniqueness instead.   Choose to engage differences through revering individual true callings to create greater gain and abundant benefits for all.

I’m creating playgrounds of right livelihood because by seeing the significance in my brother’s calling I can more assuredly find the courage to follow my own.  By catching the spirit of my sister’s calling I’m lifted and inspired to follow through and answer my own.

This first Pittsburgh event on January 2, will recreate what might have been had we all developed without the fear.  Can you imagine the lift?  Can you consider the likelihood of discovering a brand new calling together with others who hold the same vision while co-creating in vibrant New Year energy?

By trusting one another deeply, we evolve more rapidly, as we might have naturally, if we had always lived within mutually supportive environments of highly aware, intelligent connection.

Passion is evoked when we connect to others, purpose to purpose.  Meg Wheatley

Yes we are all connected and we can all play a bigger game by recognizing how much we mean to one another.  You are deeply important to me.   I love your wildness because it encourages my own.  Please bring all of you out to play.

Do not apologize for your emerging magnificence.  Those around you will either feel this call of connection or it will fall on dead ears. What has life become if we can’t freely share our exaltations for fear of offending others? Screw that!  Be your wild ass self please!

I accept that it’s my calling to poke, provoke and upset your apple cart.   That’s the whole point.  If you want both deep fulfillment and piles of money you may need to pull a new cart.  We’re in this together and attracted by your courageous calling we’ll all offer you a boost until you gather your momentum.

I am in such a clear blue field of glory right now that I can only inspire. I could use your help with a little grounding. If you have questions about discovering or validating true calling, with group connection, please ask them below.

If you really get what I’m saying try this experiment. Go forth and spread the word. Feel your awaiting connection to others on this sacred path.  Your soul will be nurtured by the authentic expression and the emerging heart to heart connection.

Evan Hadkins was naturally inspired to invite his readers  along for the ride to hear about new developments first here: Join us.

Can you feel our connection? What are you willing to do about it now?

Ripening Bliss

This is a pretty much off-the-cuff report on what’s been going on with me in the last week.   I’ve identified a very big objective and I’m working through a gestation period to allow my ideas to fully form.  Realizations are coming rapid fire and my certainty and confidence are growing daily.  tomshawiianphoto

Perhaps you’ve tried to do what you love to do but not enough money has followed.  Or you make lots of money but starve your soul.  Or you might know your big dream but you’re afraid to make the leap.  Or you want to be independent, fulfilled and prosperous but have yet to discover what to go for or how to bring it about. If any of that applies to you read on.

I was talking to colleague and regular reader Keena recently and she remarked how my posts have had a kind of ramping up momentum to them lately.  Keena is right on (a very good trait to have in her business).

So what have I been ramping up for?  In this post,  Make Your Life Count, I hinted about my new big thing.   Funny how it’s become bigger than I ever imagined it would be.

I’ve fully identified the what.   Now I only have to develop the more involved but easier work of the how to.

In this post, I said I was dedicating this year to reconnecting the link between authenticity and prosperity.

I’ve decided that reconnecting that link has become my life’s work and the mission of my soul here on earth.

Funny, I’ve always resisted using the life’s purpose term; probably because as a dedicated Scanner I didn’t like the permanence it implied.

But Holy Shit this is a whole different thing.  This is the real deal and the big banana all rolled into one.  So I’ve set the clock for 60 minutes and I want to share some raw realizations that may be helpful for those of you who are also on a path to discover your souls’ mission.

Yes you’ve read it right.  I’m making it my life’s work to reconnect the link between your original authenticity and your abundance.  For all who want to play along it’s time to put an end to this growing lack of vocational fulfillment.  I’ve got no choice.  I’ve been called in grand fashion and I’m up for it.

My Coaching

My main coaching gig has been coaching the leap to self-employment freedom.  Until my abundance fully manifests I’ll continue to serve one-on-one clients with this aim.  In fact I’m putting it out there – if you are scared shitless because you want to make a very big thing happen now, it will be very advantageous for you to work with me while I’m doing the same thing for myself.

Use Divine Coalescence

Call on Spirit to coalesce and assemble all the discordant facts, learning and realizations you’ve had in your conscious lifetime.  The good news is, even if you’re vocationally lost there is an Authentic Accumulation going on.  This aggrandizement has been amassing and gathering all the forces both seen and unseen in service of your good.  I’ll explain more on how to do this later.   But for now if you’re tuned in – ask for the coalescence to begin.

Hints Of Things To Come

Writing is not my best medium for delivering inspirational transformation.  Phone is good.  Groups on the phone are better.  In person is best.  You may want to pack your bags for an upcoming visit to Pittsburgh because the experiences I’m planning will more than knock your socks off.

I’m not sure how many more posts I’ll be publishing here at Delightful Work. Obviously the Reconnection requires it’s own home.  I’ll send you there once I’ve moved.  If you want to be sure not to miss major announcements and alliance opportunities subscribe to this email list, which is only for inspiring this big link.

Invite Mutation & Evolutionary Flux

Words can’t describe the raw energy that comes rushing in once you hit the mark on your calling!  Callings get heard from a strong declaration of “Bring it on Soul, I’m open and listening and ready to go wherever the journey calls.”  Know this – acceleration happens once you truly let go of dictating terms and throw yourself wide open to guidance.

Rapid Realization

I’ve surrendered.  Now I know what the artist who can’t quit painting feels like.  I must allow the Universe to work out the most important intentions so I’m turning a lot over to higher good.  I’ve been compelled to get my exercise outdoors in more natural settings lately because the ideas flow gloriously in nature.

Right Business Model

The right dream with the wrong business model slows development unnecessarily.  That delay could kill your dream if you don’t have the determination to hang in there no matter what.  And you’re not going to hang in there if you are working on a third place dream.  This has been my most valuable realization.

I know that there are those of you out there who have been trying to hit your sweet spot for some time without success.   I suspect that you also could have fallen prey to your caution.

Consider this.  When you do the business stuff wrong or make the wrong choices is it really because you don’t know how to do the business stuff right? Or is it because you haven’t chosen purely enough?

Could you be playing too small?  Could it be that somewhere, deep within, you really do know what your authentic work is and you know that eventually you will go for it?

I’m a ballsy guy but it took every once of courage I have to go public before working out all the kinks in this link.  But I also know that’s the way I’ll help those of you who want it the most.  I’ll be continuing to put out less polished stuff that you may find helpful.

Of this I am certain. We are all in this together. The link will not connect without the strong unconditional support of those who also believe in the glory of uniqueness.  I welcome all supportive comments and questions for connecting your link.   Let the real games begin now.

Make Your Life Count

Every thought, spoken word, environment, person, and deed contributes to what you are in the midst of creating. iStock_000003842598XSmall

Everything counts to move you in the direction of what you want or in the direction of what you don’t.

Standing pat is a lie.  When you think you’re standing pat you are really slipping slowly away from what you want.

Authenticity must me chosen again and again.  Authenticity is an active practice.

Look within and decide what’s really right for you.   At your core you are brilliant.  Quit pretending that you don’t know how to be real.

Your conditioning wins when you refuse to stand tall and choose what only you can create.

Here’s one thing that really pisses me off!   It really pisses me off when people say everything has already been invented.   It really pisses me off when they say everything has already been created.   Bull!  Even the sandwich I ate yesterday was an original.

Don’t spread that crap.  I’m not here to live some copycat life and you aren’t either.

You’re one in 6,775,480,099 and you doubt your uniqueness?  Bull!  You have what it takes.  Cash in on your authenticity!

There’s a direct link between authenticity and prosperity and you’ll never make the connection by believing that you can’t.

Even your environments are unique.  Environments either support or smother.   What’s the environment at your work doing for you?

Other people either encourage or exhaust.  Are you hanging around encouragers?

We live in a black and white world but we’d like to believe that we don’t.  We want to believe in grey because it seems like a place of rest.  But the only real sanctuary is aliveness.  Playing it safe is a slow death.

The only real refuge is found within courageous, authentic practice.

I’m working on something really big right now, it’s scaring the hell out of me and I love it.

We were built for aliveness and challenge.  We were built for glorious boldness.  We were built for hard charging.

We are warhorses.  We were built to gallop.  When we try to trot through life, by just getting by, we never reach the true authentic creation that we’re capable of.

Everything in your life you create, promote, allow or refuse.

Create anew.

Or … open your eyes wide to accept and allow.

Or … choose to endorse and promote.

Or …be strong and say no thank you.

Wake up! There are no other choices.

Wake up! Your life is happening right now.

Wake up! Everything counts. Choose authentic aliveness.

Become more aware to lessen the effect of random occurrences.  Decide what works, what does not and bravely choose what works.

Choose life or lose life.  It’s your call.

Fear Cripples Authenticity

Fear cripples authenticity and once crippled it doesn’t hold enough power to sustain itself.  Our dreams then become like kites without wind. iStock_000007626121XSmall

That’s the problem with compromise. When you settle for less than you know you could have, you poke a little hole in your soul.

We can only take so many hits to our authenticity.  After awhile the only thing that will resurrect it is full bore, courageous, original choices.

My intention in this post is to cause you to pause and see where your compromises are slowly killing you. You have many unknown friends and supporters who await the inspiration of authentic expression that only you can offer.

Yes, we are all unique but there are threads and themes of affinity running through us.  We lift one another by standing tall enough so that others can feel the light from our boldness.

When you stand tall by making an authentic choice, in an area that also inspires me; I stand a little taller too.

We are so close to tipping our world back to authentic harmony.

More and more of us each day are beating the drum of authentic expression.  The biggest obstacle to enjoying such a world is simply the fear of looking like a fool.

But who’s truly the fool?  One who stumbles in sincere authentic expression or one who hides safely behind the insidious mask of trying to fit in?

Because of societal conditioning, the fear of looking like a fool runs like faulty DNA through the fiber of our beings and the only antidote is choosing more authentically, more often.

Pure authenticity is the only thing big enough worth risking the approval of others.  Authenticity requires glorious tribute to individual courage.

When you make the decision to stand tall in your own magnificence you must follow-through and announce it.  Authenticity without expression is a watered down, less powerful force that causes unnecessary internal struggle.

If you’ve been brave but falling short of the mark look and see if you may have been holding back or watering down your expression.

Authenticity is best used in service to transformation.  It’s truly the action of coming back to our most genuine core.  Such genuineness must be seized and asserted with the glory it deserves.

Fear not.  You have what it takes.  Claim the work life you were meant to enjoy and check back here often.  I’ve decided to lead this charge in a much bigger way.

If you want to take full control of your website and stop being held hostage by your webmaster, join a very authentic friend of mine, Suzanne Bird-Harris, for a full week of WordPress Summer Camp, on the phone, to learn everything you need to know to successfully and easily take control of your website. Suzanne is a hoot and a masterful teacher. Check out her surprisingly affordable camp.

Celebrate Your Strangeness

I was engaged in some rapid channel changing and heard a speaker at the Michael Jackson memorial service telling Jackson’s children not to believe that their Dad was strange.  Huh?   This speaker meant well but you and I both know that Jackson was about as strange as one could be. iStock_000006278956XSmall

And his strangeness made him rich.

Being strange and having the courage to express your strangeness is a very good thing.

We tend to revere oddness and weird exceptionality in our celebrities but at the same time caution against standing out from the crowd.

But only good things can happen by being strange.

We need to embrace our strangeness, bring it forth and express it.  In fact our strangeness is the business edge we’ve looking for.

Shopping malls make me want to puke.  Their sameness is depressing.

How likely are you to want to do business with the most common, normal, regular, standard and usual option you can find?

Wouldn’t you rather invest in a relationship with someone astonishing, astounding, atypical, bizarre, curious, different, eccentric, exceptional, extraordinary, fantastic, far-out, marvelous, rare, remarkable, wonderful, or unheard of?

Expressed strangeness can be very good for business.  I understand that many of you struggle declaring a niche.  How about choosing a niche that spotlights your peculiarities?

Here are some of my most sincere wishes.

I wish that we could only fit in by standing out.

I wish it were forbidden to allow fear to stop you.

I wish it were illegal to settle for less than you could be or have.

I wish we were all encouraged to embrace our strangeness from cradle to grave.

Have you been holding back for fear of not fitting it?

We all fall prey to it in one way or another.  I want to encourage you to celebrate your authentic strangeness.

If you’re self-employed, your strangeness could be the only thing that will save your ass.

But strangeness can be a shy, odd cousin who’s been kept in the basement far too long.  You may have to coax it out gradually.  Here are a few hints on how to invite your strangeness out.

1). What do you deeply care about, so much so that you’re willing to take a stand for it?  Identify that and you’ll be better able to identify the specific strangeness that could give you your edge in the marketplace.

2). What eccentricities do you secretly admire about yourself?  If you thought that your pot of gold were at the end of the rainbow of utter transparency –  would you reveal yourself fully?

3). Where do you tend to say screw being cautious, push societal limits and take concepts to the extreme?  Here’s where your big balls are found and we all know the glory that can be seized with a big set of balls.  Don’t fret, if you can identify this extreme it’s a given that you have the strengths and capacity to pull it off.

4). What abnormalities are you curiously attracted to?  Within this area of singular fascination could be the personal breakthrough you’ve been yearning for.

Your commonness is killing you. Being common is boring and unattractive. It’s hard for us to notice the normal you.

Please be your strange self and we’ll love you even more.

In your comment will you answer one of the questions above?  I’ll get us going. Here’s my answer to number 3.

I tend to take authenticity to an extreme wildness.  I abhor appropriateness because I think it’s boring conditioning.  Thus I’ve been called too raw, too direct and even obnoxious.  But I love my raw, fearless nature because it allows me to steadfastly champion my coaching clients who want to blaze trails of their own.

How To Extract Your Waiting Wisdom

You are smarter, more capable and far better off than you think you are, but only when you decide to connect to your deep well of waiting wisdom within. istock_000003366515xsmall

Your greatest wisdom exists deep within because as you age layer upon layer of false assumptions, comparisons, judgments and the opinions of others are piled on top of it. For an exploration of this nature you need the proper excavation tools to dig past all of that outside junk.

Yet your beautiful, powerful mind is so protective of past conclusions that you have to resort to trickery so that your conscious mind can step back and allow your inner wisdom to emerge.

The key to authentic business building is to operate more and more consciously and less and less mechanically.

When we look to others to supply our wisdom we are often in misalignment with our own original potential.  By going deep and extracting your own wisdom you automatically have increased the probability of success.

My greatest service as a life coach, coaching new business owners is selecting the right tools to guide the inner journey so that my clients can find and express their authentic selves.

The right tool will facilitate high performance by raising self-understanding, self-esteem and personal effectiveness. This allows us to access wisdom and other resources that normally remain hidden from our consciousness. Without digging deep this wisdom does not normally show up in our behavior.

One of the most powerful tools I use in this work is sentence stem completion.  I first read about it in Nathaniel Branden’s book The Six Pillars of Self Esteem.  Sentence stem completion is most effective as a tool to facilitate understanding, liberate self-expression and activate self-healing.

Sentence stem completion rests on he premise that all of us have more knowledge than we are normally aware of – more wisdom than we use, more potentials than typically show up in our behavior. Sentence completion is a tool for accessing and activating these “hidden resources.”  When we intensify awareness, we tend to generate a need for action that expresses our changed psychological state.  Nathaniel Branden

Sentence Stem Completion Instructions

1). Begin with an uncompleted sentence stem in the area of your exploration. Here are some possibilities that have served my clients well.

If I really wanted to achieve this goal  …
When I apply 10% more consciousness to my activities …
If I truly wanted to create my own unique product I’d …
My most powerfully productive business decision this quarter would be to …

2). Repeat the stem each time out loud and then jot down the completion. Some feel more comfortable working with a tape recorder and then going back and transcribing. It’s the speed and lack of self-judgment that lowers repressive barriers and allows the wisdom to emerge. This is a rapid-fire exercise — do not sit and stew over answers. Just say the stem and complete the sentence as rapidly as possible. No pauses, the game is to answer quickly one after another. Don’t worry about the validity of what you’re coming up with while you’re doing it. Just complete each sentence and then again.

3). For each sentence stem keep adding completions as fast as possible. Work with the same stems for seven days in a row. No pauses to think in between. Just write. Each stem must be a complete sentence. Stems may be repeated on different days but on any one day, all stems need to be different. Complete at least six endings for each stem, each day.

4). At the end of the week reflect on what you’ve written. Allow yourself to be surprised about what you’ve written.  At the end of seven days look at all of your completions and select the top three you are willing to act on. This wisdom may need further refinement but it will beat the root of your most optimum and effective actions.

Here’s the good news.  The wisdom you seek is seeking you.  Your internal guidance has been trying to get your attention to shine a light on your optimum path.  You willingness to go deep and bring it forth will definitely accelerate the process.

Wisdom serves as widening of perception and somehow allows us to see situations and intentions in a new light.

This new light expands possibilities so we don’t jump to limiting conclusions based on past experience.  Instead we are emboldened to create our very own brave new world.

Stand Up For Individuality

Do you champion individuality?  Do you routinely encourage unique individuals to express themselves?  Do you listen to your authentic individuality or your fears?  It’s fun and freeing to boldly flaunt your wild, uninhibited individuality.

As a coach, I listen to client fears and prescribe tools and strategies to move  forward in spite of them.  This process is a big part of foundational life coaching before clients are confidently ready to apply business coaching.

Listening to the core fears of hundreds of courageous people has honored me.  These individuals are courageous because they are willing to fully express their fears.

The similarity of their fears is very telling.

You may believe that your fears are unique to you but they aren’t.

You either have fears of success or of failure.  You may have fears of not being capable in one area or another.  Or you have fears of not having enough time or enough money.  That’s it.

A vast majority of the fears fall into one of those five categories.

Individuals are brilliantly unique but their fears are strikingly common.

The marketplace rewards authentic differentiation and devalues what’s common.

Conformity is common.  The fearful conform.  Conformity is common obedience.  Conformity dilutes individual power and dulls authentic brilliance.

What do you think stops you from living fearlessly as the unique individual that you are?  Overtime fears become solidified as powerful limiting beliefs.

You only believe in your fears because you’ve lived with them for so long.  Your fears have crafted the frightening story that you keep retelling.

Yet your fearful story is just who you thought you were.  There’s nothing authentic about that story – it’s just an illusion created by years of over-thinking.   It’s not who you really are.  But you do have a choice.

The longer it takes for you to choose bold authentic expression – the longer it will take you to get what you want.

Taking a stand for your own unique individuality is a courageous and necessary component of evolution.

Buried beneath all of you fears may be an even deeper fear of your own brilliant individuality.

They have come to understand that – no punishment anyone might inflict on them could possibly be worse than the punishment they inflict upon themselves, by conspiring in their own diminishment.  Parker Palmer

I rally round the freedom flag of self-employment because working as an employee automatically makes you smaller.

Working as an employee is a consciously chosen path of personal diminishment.

What if your greatness can only be unleashed through the boldness of self-employment?

What if your fulfillment can only come by being your own man or woman, in every way?

What if the one true key to lasting business success is authentic expression?

If you are good at being you, products resulting from your ideas and character will have excellence built into them. Egbert Sukop

Others suffer by paying for inferior products and services when you settle for a job just to pay the bills.  But when you are unfaithful to your true self – you suffer the most.

If you are here unfaithfully with us – you are causing terrible damage.  Rumi

It’s time to quit telling lies about your own capabilities.

It’s time to quit repeating your fears.  Instead it’s time to embrace your wonderfully quirky individuality.

I’m looking for those who are ready right now to shed their cowardly skins and stand tall in their authentic brilliance.

You must make the decision to go for it, in your own way or your authentic brilliance will starve from a lack of self-respect.

I seek to work with the bold.

I seek to inspire and to encourage the bold.

Is it you?  It’s my honor to coach you to your greatness. Can you imagine laughing in the face of your fears?  Using the right tools you can free yourself.

There is a radiating enthusiasm building within you right now.

Free it.  Ask these questions of yourself.

“What magnificence is seeking to awaken within me?”

“What bolder, freer life is calling me forth?”

“How could I engage my individuality to astonish myself?”

Killing What Scares You

Don’t kill what scares you.  Embrace it!

What scares you the most is your raw, untamed authenticity.

istock_000003792360xsmallWhat scares the hell right out of you is the crazy brilliance that you know you really are.

This post is a call to action for those who want even more inspiring and fulfilling work.  If you really love your job – quit reading now.  But if you really want to bet the farm on you – read on!

As a career coach, here’s the question I hear most often.

“What will I be when I grow up?”

Here are two better questions.

“What was I before I grew up?”

“What wild part of me have I allowed to be beaten down and killed, for fear of being judged?”

Never destroy any aspect of personality, for what you think is the wild branch may be the heart of the tree.  Mrs. Henry George

Cultural conformity is fear-based pressure created so the real you doesn’t rock the boat

Accumulated conditioning, rules and collective fears, all pushing societal stability, will continue to separate you from your authentic wildness, if you allow it to.

Most folks claim they want their authentic freedom. But they act as though they want stability and safety.

Stability and authenticity exclude one another.

Take a stand.  Refuse fear.  Live fearlessly.

Allow your authentic wildness to flourish once more.

Don’t kill your wildness.  Flaunt your wildness.

If you really didn’t give two shits, about what anyone would say or think – what would you do then?

Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind. – Dr. Seuss

Choose boldness!

Your time is now.  Waiting is stupid, fearful thinking.  Quit listening to those who fear their own power.  The cement truck could flatten your ass tomorrow.  How’s that for timing?

It’s not timing but expressed uniqueness that truly determines exceptional success.

We increase the probability of creating a life of freedom, fulfillment and financial prosperity to the degree that we are willing to express our exceptionality.

It’s time for you to choose.  Quit allowing cultural appropriateness to crush your wildness.

It really does start with not giving a damn.  What do you think the world rewards more, being nice or being authentic?

By choosing authenticity you’re going to piss some people off.

So what, what has playing it safe done for you so far?

Be naughty.  Misbehave.  Break some stupid rules.

Be the eccentric character you really are and some may hate you.  But some will adore you.

Your only obligation in life is to be true to yourself.  Being true to anyone else or anything else is impossible.  Richard Bach

Don’t wonder what you’ll be when you grow up.  You’re already too damned grown up.  Be a kid again.  Ride your wildness all the way to the bank.

I’m not just all talk about this.  I deliver.

Bold lives are chosen and created.

Have you the courage to create the life you most want to live?

No excuses, you either do or you don’t. If this time doesn’t work for you, go here to request your own test drive coaching experience.

Embrace what sacres you.  The world is waiting for your light.

Off Kilter, Pissed and Real

Life speaks to us all the time.  Mine wouldn’t let me sleep last night.  I had some unexpressed anger to feel, so I got up at 4 AM and wrote it out.  My favorite anger release is to go outside and play “Little John” by smacking some dead trees with my staff, but it’s too damn cold for that. sunburst_space1

Anger is an emotion that begins first as a feeling (physical vibration) in our bodies. But if we don’t give it the space and time to be felt, it will just duck under the covers of our consciousness and come back to bite us in the ass later.  Feelings don’t morph into emotions until we attach thoughts to them. When we don’t feel a feeling and instead judge it as good or bad, it must surface in the way we’ve labeled it.

On Monday I got some disappointing feedback, not in its truth but in its delivery.  I’d shared my vulnerability with a friend and asked him to be gentle, supportive and encouraging, regardless of the quality of the work I’d submitted, for his review.  For some unknown reason, he was unnecessarily harsh.  But since I wanted the feedback, I silently listened and took notes. Interestingly I’d just written about support and speaking up.

I knew that my friend’s behavior was just a trigger for a deeper self-anger that I’d buried.  I’ve previously shared the techniques I use to feel my feelings and about the power in begin pissed.  So I’ll not cover that ground again.  But I would like to write about accepting our darker sides.

Authenticity isn’t just something that we express when every thing is coming up roses. It’s also authentic to be pissed when you feel off kilter and anger is trying to surface.  Years ago I quit wearing the mask of false happiness. While writing this I was tweeting back and forth with fellow coach Tim Brownson when he half-jokingly said.

I don’t even know what authentic is other than to be doing what I want to be doing. Tim Brownson

Thanks Tim, that seems like a pretty powerful definition to me.
But is it advisable to share ones authentic darker side, in a public forum like Twitter?

A well-known social media expert recently tweeted something like this. “Don’t share anything here that you wouldn’t put up on billboards all over town.” Even that pissed me off, because he seemed to be saying, “wear the mask – don’t be real – be careful.” Bullshit to that! I wouldn’t pay to express my anger on a billboard but I’ll not run from it either.

Perhaps people, who play it safe and cautious, end up doing business with others who also value appropriateness over authenticity. I guess playing it safe could be genuine for them. But when I see someone holding back, I question his or her integrity. I think trust comes first, from simply being real.

I’ll close with my favorite three stanzas from The Invitation, by Oriah Mountain Dreamer.

It doesn’t interest me how old you are.
I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool
for love
for your dream
for the adventure of being alive.

It doesn’t interest me what planets are squaring your moon…
I want to know if you have touched the centre of your own sorrow
if you have been opened by life’s betrayals
or have become shriveled and closed
from fear of further pain.

I want to know if you can sit with pain
mine or your own
without moving to hide it
or fade it
or fix it.   Oriah Mountain Dreamer

Resources:

If you’re just dipping your toes in the social media waters, here are four experts worthy of your trust: Christine Gallagher, Kathy Hendershot-Hurd, Kim Woodbridge and Suzanne Bird-Harris.