Too Good & Challenging To Miss

Readers of this blog know that I love wake up calls and fresh smacks in the face.  I’m convinced that the most loving thing we can do for ourselves is to tell the whole truth to ourselves about ourselves. Great idea!

Realizations are essential to creating the life you want to live.  Never stand pat.   Choose powerful stimulating experiences.  Coaching is really an experience in insight stimulation and engagement.

Fresh realizations come charged with the energy to create.  That’s why it’s so important to seize your moment of discovery with bold action.

So here’s some truth jarring stuff I’ve come across lately for your reading and listening delight.

Bill Weil has made his powerful relationship book, New Earth Relationships, available on audio down load.  It’s so good I use it as a tool with my relationship-coaching clients.

In the Crappiness of Happiness Egbert Sukop will piss you off, shake you up and give you a major case of head scratching.  I love what he says about the “bitch lag”.

In Are Your Dreams Big Enough, Slade Roberson asks some wonderfully challenging questions.  Answer them – you could change your life.

What are you reading or listening too that rocks your world?

A Father’s Day Tribute to my Dad, Tom-on-the Hill

It was a sunny summer day in 1956. I was six years old and my Dad came to me and asked me how much money I had. I counted my nickels and pennies and told him 17 cents. He said that just might be enough, why don’t you go and see? Lou our neighbor across the street had a litter of Collie/Irish setter mixed breed puppies and my Dad had set it up with Lou to accept whatever I had as payment. Dad waited on the bank for me while I went across the road by myself to see the puppies. I came back with Spotty my dog for 10 joy-filled years.

I’m thinking about my Dad today because this is my second Father’s Day since he passed in May of last year. As I write today. I’m not sure if this post will have any great life lessons or have any purpose at all – other than to pay tribute to a great guy, my Dad, Tom-on-the Hill.

I do hope it will cause you to gratefully reflect today on the connection you have or had with your Dad. Like his son, my Dad was far from perfect. But I take comfort in knowing that he did the best job he knew how to do. A very strange dynamic exists between fathers and sons. As a teenager I recall being perplexed about why my friends thought my Dad was so cool. I can see our relationship much clearer now. As I listen to Harry Chapin sing Cat’s in the Cradle, much more than sadness comes up for me today. Some say we choose our parents. If that’s the case – it’s the wisest choice I’ve ever made.

I’d like you to meet my Dad, Tom-on-the Hill. Every man he met for the first time he called chief and everyone he knew, he called buddy. When he called you buddy, you felt like his buddy.

He was proud that he’d built his own home, with his own hands. The home he built is exactly one mile from Mingo Church at the highest point on the hill. In fact that’s how he identified himself on the phone. This is Tom, Tom Volkar, up on the hill.

Dad never did learn to say no. I couldn’t understand that. Growing up, time after time, I’d hear him agree to do another side plastering patch job he didn’t feel like doing. He may have said yes a lot when he wanted to say no, but over the years it was all the yeses of help to many, when they needed it most that made him the friend he was. That deep generosity of his workingman services was his strength.

He lived by this motto. If you can’t say anything good about someone – say nothing at all. He made you feel comfortable. He expressed genuine concern. And always together with Mom, in his home you felt at home.

It’s been said that the most honest measure of love is how we feel in another’s presence. By that measure my Dad was a champion.

Too often we underestimate the power of a pat on the back, a smile, a listening ear, the encouragement of a strong and loving grip, or even the smallest act of caring all of which add up to a life that in many small ways did indeed make the world a better place.

My Dad, Tom gave all those things and more. Now as I attend family gatherings and observe our family I feel truly blessed.

For the true measure of a man, of Tom-on-the-Hill, must surely be in the collective character, closeness and love of the family he created that will live on forever inspired by his gentle Spirit.

Because Spring Is the Time of Love

In my last post I wrote about celebration. Now I’d like to celebrate a success story of one of the people I coach. About a year ago, Bill shared with me an idea for an online relationship-enhancing tool. Bill is one of those folks, like so many of us, that just need someone firmly in his corner to take, and stay in, action. The next few weeks we tossed some ideas back and forth, and then Bill committed to take steps to have the system developed. Bill continued to set targets, making some, missing others, and processing whatever needed to be processed to remain in action.

If you are currently in a romantic relationship, I invite you to try LovePong. It’s fun, it’s free, and it really works!

If you have an idea for a business that you’d like to discuss with me, drop me a line. I’d love to support you in any way I can.

A Client’s Perspective – How I Use My Coach
By Bill Weil

When Tom and I first began working together, he shared his perspective that a coach is simply a tool to add the greatest possible value to the client’s life and business. So how do I use my coach?

  • As a nurturing, safe and affirming sounding board
  • As an accountability partner, so that I honor my own promises
  • As a nudge to get me off the dime and into action
  • As a fellow brainstormer, with an unbiased, third-party view
  • Finally, as a “negative energy clearer,” so that I can release all the raging emotions and conflicting thoughts in my head, find my clarity, and be productive.

I have benefited tremendously from Tom’s coaching and support. I would (and do!) highly recommend Tom to really anyone who is serious about taking their business, or their life, to the next level.