Doubt is good when you know you’re ready for what’s next, even though you don’t yet know what’s next.
A lack of clarity and certainty is very good news when you can see it for what it is.
When the light of understanding is temporarily replaced by the darkness of doubt, the doubt can be very good when you frame it within an anticipation of coming good.
What if that precarious resting place between the completion of one stage and the beginning of the next is nothing more than your soul catching its breath?
I know what I’m talking about because that’s exactly where I am right now, with my writing, my marketing and the next iteration of my calling. (You didn’t think you find your calling and it’s game over, did you?)
You might know that place. It’s the place where everything you think and write (at least to you) smells like shit.
It’s that place when you feel like you don’t give a shit but you really feel that way because you do.
It’s that place when you begin to question every move and wonder when in the hell am I ever going to get my shit together? (At this point in my writing I thought about all the good shit (literally) in my compost pile and I almost went off on a metaphorical tangent about the benefits of combining shit.) See what I mean?
(Early in my blogging career I used the word ‘God’ in a post and lost 60 subscribers overnight. So I figured maybe I’d get them back by using ‘fuck’ in this one. Oh shit those aren’t the same scaredy cats are they?)
(Maybe I was simply ready to go public with the shit-hell-fuck trifecta?) That’s the darker side of the swinging doubt pendulum but it was an accurate read on my mood before I realized I was simply in a state of gloriously good doubt.
(One of my best web buddies, Suzanne Bird-Harris, says I should write more as rugby-playing Tom than deep thinker Tom, so you can credit her inspiration for the off-color candor in this post.)
I am not talking about the kind of self-doubt that has you searching the web and comparing yourself to everyone else and coming up short. That shit will kill you. (Maybe I should have called this post Good Shit & Bad Shit?) (Jeez!) (Am I going to end up writing more in parenthesis than not?)
I’m also not talking about the kind of self-doubt that has you questioning anything personal about your capability, talents or identity. That shit stunts your growth and will eventually kill your spirit within.
Good doubt is simply a lack of clarity of direction. You’re all dressed up and ready to go but you don’t know where you’re headed.
Good doubt is having the balls to hang in there with the unknown. Good doubt is actually embracing the unknown and immersing yourself within it because you know that everything happens for your good.
Hang onto that. The Universe conspires on your behalf.
Everything that happens happens for a good purpose to benefit you. If you can’t believe that, then life really does suck and then you die.
If you’ve ever been where I am right now you’ll know this feeling. You reach the crossroads, all the signs are down and even your inner sense of direction feels foggy.
Halleluiah! Praise the Gods of Change! You have been blessed with the good of uncertainty.
Life is about shifts, adjustments and punches in the gut. Rolling with the punches means not resisting them but using momentum to see the good.
Sorry folks, I have no answers today. I only have questions for those of you who want to leverage your good doubt to arrive at newfound aliveness.
Don’t fight it – roll with it. Just live with some very good questions and see what comes to you. Here are some of my favorite good doubt questions. Use them at your own risk of startling clarity.
What good purpose might my impatience serve?
What’s next for me that I can’t quite see?
How would Ben Franklin (or respected thinker of your choice) solve this one?
For what good purpose am I experiencing this unpleasant circumstance?
What insights can I almost grasp that would explain where I am?
How can I change my point of view to see things differently?
If I could plug my brain directly into Divine Intelligence, what surge of brilliance might come?
I’m off to meet the Wizard. Tell me what you think of this shit.
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